| Author | Message | ||
| Robby Desmond
New member Username: angwe Post Number: 4 Registered: 07-2006 |
Hello all, New to the forum. Just posted a poem. Looking to see if I can make some changes to my style to come out prettier on paper. I read a lot of my poetry and that is something I've been told comes immediately across. However, it seems to be an occasional handicap. I'd like to see if writing here can help me reform my ideas in different ways and get me writing again. That all said, would anyone recommend a better place to get spoken-word-type poetry critiqued, or are there people here who are keen on that? I am trying to give myself range, so I will be posting stylistically "new" stuff and I look forward to the ability to gauge the level of critique I'm amenable to on my experiments. C-YA, -Robby | ||
| Fred Longworth
Member Username: sandiegopoet Post Number: 71 Registered: 05-2006 |
Hello Robby, To me (and I've done a lot of spoken word) the MAIN difference between spoken word and page poetry is that spoken word is designed to be pretty much accessible on the first pass. There may be subtle nuggets imbedded in the poem that repeated hearing will reveal; but people will usually not say, "Hey, Rob . . . would you reread stanza three again. I want to savor the way it sets up the thing about the skeletal tree in stanza five." On the other hand, a page poem will often be designed to be read and reread, and for the meaning to emerge from backtracking repeatedly to earlier lines in the poem. As ya know, the best "critique" of spoken word is often in a SLAM event; but, realistically, on line you need to post in such a way that your on-line audience will be able to hear you deliver your work. One way to do this here would be to post a link so people can read the work at the top of the thread AND then hear it by clicking on the link. Best, Fred | ||
| "A-Bear"
Moderator Username: dane Post Number: 1767 Registered: 11-1998 |
Robby -I answered this in Heavy Critique before reading your post here. Fred pretty much mirrored my thought on the subject (if not better) and I can't think of anything else to say on the subject that might be helpful in your quest. This I will say, however, go with your strength (always). I admire your desire to make yourself understood on paper, but all things equal, if it comes across better in spoken word -develop that talent to its fullest potential. *smiles* D | ||
| steve williams
Board Administrator Username: twobyfour Post Number: 744 Registered: 05-2005 |
hi robby all poetry should be music and sound good when read aloud. SLAM poetry should not be confused with rap music and i think that has been the case in some venues. All good poems have a rhythm and in most cases, the rhythm accentuates the meaning. In other words, when the poet wishes to emphasize a line, he/she changes the rhythm for that line. its analagous to a change of key in a popular song. so, the short of it for me, is do not sacrifice sound for meaning or meaning for sound, the best works have the best of both. as an example, here is a poem by M that sounds wonderful yet still has great meaning. I've heard this in an open mike setting and the audience loved it. s Appliance of Self-Analysis | ||
| Robby Desmond
New member Username: angwe Post Number: 7 Registered: 07-2006 |
Hello all, Thanks for your support! I like the idea of recording my reading for possible critique. I'll see what I can do. Maybe well-compressed MP3s to keep the files small, eh? @steve: I never sacrifice one for the other, though I usually let sound help me find the right words for my meaning. C-YA -R | ||
| Gary Blankenship
Senior Member Username: garyb Post Number: 8554 Registered: 07-2001 |
In my limited experience, if it works on the page, it works in a read... Smiles and good luck. Gary A River Transformed The Dawg House July FireWeed more War/Peace |
